Before you pass judgement on me, hear me out! My married, 26 year old Daughter recently told me that she couldn't wait to have kids so she could lie to them. It was one of my proudest moments!! Here's why...
I've always been very honest with my children about the important things. But when it comes to aliens, their heritage or sex...a little lieing can be benificial and a total kick in the pants!
Here are just a few examples of fun lies I've told my kids:
Lie #1) There are small green people on the moon.
Yes honey, (to my then, 6th grade daughter) it's true! I just saw it on the news.
I managed to convince her, so (obviously), she had no real choice but to share this bit
of ground breaking information with her entire 6th grade class during current events.
Apparently she was quite determined and convincing. The teacher questioned
her at length, but she stood her ground! That's my girl!! I recieved a call from her
(very confused) teacher that evening. She asked where I had obtained my information
but I could barely stop laughing long enough to tell her it was a joke. God bless kids
and their trust in their parents! Two nights later, the teacher called again to explain
that she'd recieved calls from parents of her students inquiring about the reliabilty
of this "current event". After that, no matter how much the teacher (and my
daughter) told the class it was simply a joke, they remained unconvinced, certain
that adults wanted to withhold the truth from them yet again! I'm sure they are
still walking around, as young adults today, convinced there are little green people
on the moon! Yay for me!
Lie #2) Yes Sweetie, You ARE One Eighth African American!
When yet another daughter was in 6th grade I told her she was an Eighth African
American.
Why, you might ask, would I tell my little white skinned, red headed, freckle faced
daughter such a thing? Because I could. I convinced her that my father had been
half black and my grandfather had been full blooded African American. I told her
those were not freckles on her face but dark pigmentations from her heritage.
She began to refer to blacks as "her people"! You can't imagine how funny this is unless
you've seen my daughter! So, there's this huge block party. I had to leave early.
My daughter stayed and apparently regailed all of our neighbors and friends with
stories of "her people". They were quite perplexed but she argued to defend "her
people" and "her heritage". Well, of course, I recieved a call from a curious neighbor
a day or two later. Once again, I laughed so hard I cried. I told her I was just messing
with my daughter's mind, as I feel all parents should do. Although I set the story
straight with her as well as my (irritated) daughter, I am sure there are still people out
there that are amazed at how white she looks for a (partially) black child!
Lie #3 You Must Have a Sex License!
I saved this for last because it is my personal favorite! When one of my girls (thank
goodness I have so many kids to mess with!) was about 10 or 11, I explained to her
(very matter-of-factly) that no one could have sex without a license before they were 32
years old. What a way to keep your daughter innocent for a very long time! If she asked
a question, I was prepared with an answer. "Yes, when people under 32 get married,
their marraige license IS their Sex Lisence". "Yes, some girls get pregnant as teenagers,
but they are fined heavily by the state." "Yes, there are holes in the law. It's not fair
that sometimes boys under 32 have sex and don't get caught but they are still breaking
the law!!"
You should hear her argue and defend this law, even today, at 14, with her friends! Wow!
Good times! I'm usually right there to back her up! After all, it's NOT a very well known
law. All of my older kids (she's the youngest) are waiting for the ball to drop when she
finds out it was all a story...but for the mean time, her innocense is protected! ; )
You may think I'm crazy but I feel no harm is done. I've raised all of my kids this way. When all is said and done, they laugh at my stories and their gulibility and it doesn't hurt anyone...but it's an endless source of entertainment for me!!!
Remember, No one said Parenting shouldn't be FUN!!!
